theworstbandever » Tony and Stevie

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36 weeks – It’s time to get ready!

4 weeks to go!  Holy crazy!

It’s starting to get pretty real around here.   A few days ago I woke up in the middle of the night (much like I normally do these days) with my mind reeling about anything and everything.   The car seat isn’t ready …  the cradle has no mattress … Do we even own any pants for the baby??   Wait!! .. now this stomach cramp i’m feeling is only on the right hand side .. is it apendicitis?   Can they remove your appendix while you are pregnant? .. at this point would they just take the baby and the appendix out at the same time??   And then my sleepless, heart-burn charged anxiety took a more morbid turn  …   what if something happens to me?  Would Tony know how to take care of a baby without me?   Of course not!!  Surely his world would crumble immediately!!!  How will they survive??!!   ..  You get the idea …  It’s pretty much a rinse and repeat version of this scenario every night between 4-5:30am.

Sidenote for you expectant fathers out there dealing with an irrational wife.  When your wife tells you she was up in the night  fearful of how you wouldn’t  be able to take care of a newborn baby following her unexpected demise .. the most reassuring response is NOT  “I know stuff about babies .. I would be fine”.   It doesn’t have quite the calming effect that you think it will.   😉

To help feel more ‘ready’  Tony and I made a list of all the baby basics that we HAD to do/get/buy/learn and I have been racing through them with wreckless abandon all week.  Luckily my mom was here to help.  We got a mattress for the cradle ….  made 3 sets of homemade sheets for it (well technically my mom did) …  set up the new (to us) carseat / scheduled an appt to have it installed/inspected .. And shopped for any missing items we would be needing.   Our UPS driver is starting to think we own stock in Amazon Prime.

I’m still obsessed with having everything in my life cleaned before the baby gets here. And my car was a big one!    It has (or HAD rather) eleven years of dirt and grime ground into the seats and carpet and there was no way we could bring home our sweet precious baby strapped to it in that condition. So I splurged and got the FULL glorious detailing. The one that comes with spit shine, carpet shampooing and the you-can-now-lick-the-dashboard polish!!    I was WAY more excited about this car wash than any single person should ever be excited about anything.   But hey, nesting does weird things to weird people. Now I’m on the lookout for the same treatment for our house!!

In grown up news we got a new family health insurance plan, interviewed pediatricians, and wrote out a birth plan .. Which is much like a business plan except that it is nothing like that at all.   We are a mere shell of our former selves and our conversations have recently changed to things like vaccine schedules, baby wearing and breast pumps.   Next thing you know it will be stow and go seating and keyless entry to our minivan!!! What is happening to us?!!

It’s getting close .. and it’s getting really exciting!!

36 weeks

cradle 2cradlecarseat36 weeks 2

  • stella - I’m so excited! I can’t wait to see Baby O snuggled up in that cradle!

    About the night fears… something I’ve experienced too often, I feel you. And Tony’s response sounds like a Terence answer too. So comforting! Ha ha! A few tricks my therapist gave me to help. Not all work all the time, but some might help.
    1. Try to practice ‘observing’ your thoughts rather than being immersed in them. See them as leaves on a stream, you can watch them and acknowledge them but you do not have to pick up all the leaves. If you need to pick up one of them you can, but you can also just let them float by.
    2. A ‘worry box’ – it’s like a box you build in your mind and put your fears in there, similar concept as the stream. You can go to them when you like but they are safely locked in the box and when you feel yourself worrying you can say ‘I will put that in the box and look at it later if I need to’. Helpful when a lot of your worries are things you have no control over. There is an app I got that gives you a guided imagery of doing this and lots of internet stuff.
    3. Progressive muscle relaxation. Good anytime, but esp when you’re in bed and panicky and your husband is sleeping soundly beside you. You tense and then relax each part of your body starting with your toes. Takes a while and some concentration so helpful for both relaxing and also moving the mind away from the horrible thoughts.
    4. Breathing exercises like in a square – 4 secs in, 4 secs hold, 4 secs out, 4 secs hold (can be any time, just keep it the same).

    Unfortunately I have many anxiety tips so feel free to email me if you need more! 🙂ReplyCancel

  • Julia Snelson - Stevie,
    You crack me up while having tears in my eyes at the same time! How can that be? I love your honesty. I also cannot wait to hear of the birth of your baby and look forward to meeting him or her some day. Please tell Tony “hello” for me and as always… I wish you the BEST life has to offer.
    And oh, by the way… you two will figure out the whole thing as they come. I have total Faith in you both.
    julia (Oliver family’s former neighbors in Mankato)ReplyCancel

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